Going through a divorce can be very painful for both parties and any children involved. However, many divorcing couples are able to set aside their differences and find a resolution that works for everyone.
Tips for an Amicable Divorce
Divorces will be much less painful if they are done amicably. Here are some tips to both reduce any hard feelings and make the process go more smoothly.
Avoid Using Children as Weapons
Never use your children as bargaining chips in a divorce. Your children will be resentful and there will be much more discord in the process. You and your spouse will find things will go much more smoothly if you are both agree to be committed to putting the children first.
It is almost inevitable that both parties are going to have some level of anger towards each other during a divorce. Even if you don’t have any hatred towards your soon-to-be ex-spouse, you are certainly going to have some resentment. However, you will need to make an effort to get past it, at least enough to communicate openly. You will need to be honest and assertive about your own needs, while also staying receptive to your spouse’s.
Apologize and Try to Understand
“Forgive and forget” is an overused phrase that most human beings could never live up to. It can be very difficult to forgive a spouse that was unfaithful, nearly drove you to bankruptcy with irresponsible spending or hurt you in any way.
However, you can at least try to understand things from their perspective. Ask for an explanation for their reasons. Both spouses usually played a role in a failing marriage. You will want to find out what mistakes you made that contributed to the problem. Apologizing for anything that you have done wrong will make it much easier to resolve a failed marriage.
Make Equitable Compromises
Financial and other logistical aspects of a divorce are the most difficult, especially if you didn’t have a prenuptial agreement in place beforehand. You will need to discuss things like alimony, custody of children, division of assets and a variety of other issues. You will probably have some differences in the way that things should be divided, so a strong degree of compromise will be necessary.
It is important to understand each other’s positions when making such compromises. You will need to consider your spouse’s situation. You may need to make certain accommodations if they make less money, have health problems or have a particularly close relationship with your children.
Know When to Let Your Attorneys Negotiate
There will be some decisions that are best left to attorneys. These are the times when both spouses need to step aside from the negotiating table and let them handle it. Lawyers such as the experts at Werter Law will be able to stay objective with things that are much more difficult issues for you to discuss.